Spit & polish

Nose picking and public urinating – two things common to Vietnam; here in China, they go one better: the Vietnamese may spit in public, but the Chinese do it with real gusto.  Whilst exiting a metro station on my journey home some days ago, I passed a young Chinese couple, conversing happily.  No sooner had her partner stopped speaking, than the ‘lady’ did something virtually unheard of in the west.

I’d like to think I have a way with words and can adequately paint perceptive pictures in the minds’ of my readers.  However, I neither want to, or feel I can, do so with this scenario… but here goes.  ‘Hocking’ – a slang term for a sharp intake of breathe, designed to dislodge nasal nuisances, which are then very ‘eloquently’ disposed of with a swift outward breathe through the mouth, landing like paintball fire, hopefully avoiding passersby.

Upon witnessing this, my colleague and I starred first at her, then at each other: aghast and wide eyed, whilst her Romeo continued their conversation seemingly oblivious to Juliet’s public performance.  Numerous friends had warned me about this prior to my arrival here, but I hadn’t anticipated it being so far removed from the ‘hockers’ of the UK and Vietnam.  Luckily, we were outside and I’ve yet to witness anyone repeating such an act indoors.  The city on the whole is very clean and the honour of hosting Expo a couple of years ago seems to have contributed greatly to achieving this.  Hopefully, the Shanghainese will take more pride in their sensational city – which might in turn rub off to their public behaviour.

Whilst walking around People’s Square last Saturday afternoon I noticed a short, stout, scruffy old lady loitering with intent.  Carrying a wooden box she observes passersby, before carefully making her move.  Her aim, to mark your shoes with her cream cleaner, so you have no choice but to let her shine your shoes.  It is at this point I should mention, I noticed her too late, my left foot now appeared white and I found myself sitting on a small wall whilst she buffed my black boots; much to the amusement of my converse-wearing colleague, who was all too eager to catch the moment on camera.  Luckily, my work shoes are suede, so I shouldn’t be approached too many more times!

A xx