Culture shock

This is a term loosely bandied around and often joked about by British northerners travelling south of Birmingham, but it really does exist and is a natural process all expats experience in varying degrees.  Differences in language, food, climate, customs and social roles are all aspects that contribute to culture shock.  After a tip off from a friend a few months back, I read a very interesting blog written by two expats living in Beijing.  Their account outlines the different stages of culture shock and ways in which people deal with it.

These stages are as follows:

1.    The ‘honeymoon period’ –

All is new and exciting; the world’s your lobster and its fun to embrace all this new ‘stuff’ you’re encountering.

2.    The ‘distress’ stage –

Cultural differences become apparent and it’s all gone a bit Pete Tong.

3.    ‘Re-integration’ stage –

Frustration and rejection of your new culture, i.e. you value your own culture and identity with it in a way you never have before.

4.    ‘Acceptance’ stage –

Familiarity with the new culture puts you at ease: “bring it on; I can do this after all”.

5.    ‘Independence’ stage –

Similarities and differences are identified and appreciated. “It’s all good, we’re not all the same and I’m fine with that”.

I wouldn’t like you to think that all expats suddenly feel the compulsion to jump off the nearest bridge – the stages sound extreme, but can in fact just be small, frustrating, isolated experiences, such as my encounter with the local washer woman (see ‘losing face’ post/rant - Monday, 4 April 2011).

If you fail to spot it in yourself, it’s crystal clear when looking at friends and colleagues.  People you previously saw as being mild mannered, majestic members of society can be somewhat possessed by their tired, frustrated inner expat monster.  On arrival at our hotel during the Tet holiday, my friend was tired and just wanted to go to sleep in the room we had booked 2 weeks earlier.  After taking a copy of the email booking confirmation (in anticipation of communication difficulties) I was surprised when she suddenly started shouting and swearing at the hotel owner who was having difficulty locating our booking.  While my friend sharply inhaled on her cigarette outside, I calmly gestured toward the calendar, seeing my name written on that days date. All was well, situation diffused and a good night’s sleep had by all.

Interestingly, I find many of my colleagues have learnt to deal with culture shock by turning to alcohol. They immerse themselves in nights out with fellow teachers in a bid to con themselves in to thinking they’re back in any sticky-floored, dark and dingy club in their hometown.  I somehow feel this could only make matters worse and lead to heated exchanges with street sellers whilst drunk or nursing hangovers from hell, not to mention putting a fair old dent in their bank accounts, but hey ho, each to their own.

For me, routine is key.  As someone who has often been likened to Monica from ‘Friends’ and nicknamed ‘OCD’ due to her obsession with all things being ‘just so’, I like to run a tight ship. This helps greatly and having a regular teaching timetable as well as weekly orphanage visits and Vietnamese lessons helps to keep me on track.

Amy-lou 1-0 culture shock

…until I return to UK and experience reverse culture shock at wearing jumpers and eating with a knife and fork!

A xx